I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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