so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
We have started to decorate penises.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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