This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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