He uses pillows to masturbate.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Randomize
