how can u be prego again
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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