Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
