when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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