pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Randomize
