Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
