i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
