If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize