After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
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