She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
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