I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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