i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
