tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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