i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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