i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize
