my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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