she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
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