I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
