Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Randomize
