Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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