It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
cat food counts as protein by the way
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Randomize
