I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
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