His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
