Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
