Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
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