I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Randomize
