I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize