That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
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