he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
