I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
