You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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