Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
