After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
