This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
