Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
