I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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