id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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