My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
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