I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
