Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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