No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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