I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
