he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
