They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
