So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
