One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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