i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
