need another drink. this is the easiest way
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
