i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
